Tibetan method of parenting
Modern methods of educating the "right" children are very diverse, sometimes bison and even unnecessary advanced. At the same time, in pedagogy, there are existed ways for centuries, to learn the wisdom of which will not be superfluous for a reasonable parent. Hardly someone will be seriously argued with the fact that the "grandmother’s methods" are outdated, and therefore the horizon of knowledge in the upbringing of their children needs to be expanded.
In pedagogy, there is an eternal efficiency dilemma of different approaches – to give a maximum of freedom for organic development or monitor and restrain the slightest hint of destructive behavior. The universal permission of this dispute, of course, does not exist, but in different national traditions there are existed very curious methods. We will get acquainted with Tibetan pedagogy – a set of social practices that have proven its effectiveness, and quite applicable in the current realities, with amendment for modern society. The Tibetan system born out of the European secular humanism familiar to us, regularly "produces" to the light of harmonious people who are not inclined to aggression and persistently carrying life adversity.
In many superficial texts dedicated to the Tibetan method of education of the younger generation, all the "base" of the method, which is not thinking, reduced to the vulgar understanding of traditional Lamaism. Naturally, in practice, it does not correspond to reality – Tibet is mystical and at the same time, it is mysterious and open to knowledge, mysterious and paradoxically understanding – pedagogical practices are no exception.
The basic structure of the method is simple – childhood and youth are divided into conditional five-year periods in which, according to the ideas of Tibetans, certain social qualities are formed and knowledgeable abilities. So, let’s begin:
Tibetan method of education of children – five-year plan №1
The beginning of the life of a small Tibetan for each family is a bright and bright event, the whole depth of which to understand the average Europeans is not. Local type of Buddhism, in which the "global" Mahayana with archaic mystics was mixed, teaches about the resettlement of the soul, so in a sense, all Tibetans perceive each other as relatives and rejoice at the meeting with new close. This complex ball of feelings is not at all like our tradition, but by "charging" and the "light" of emotions is largely identical.
With a child in families, it is customary to contact how with the most expensive and important in the light of the little man. There are no prohibitions for him – any game that goes into prank can only be interrupted by distracting attention, and in no case does not "impossible". Only in the case of a real danger, a sharp sound of the voice is allowed, and that rather with warning intonation than forbidding. In most domestic episodes, the educator has enough facial expressions, a clear child. In the first years of the five-year period, such important personalities of personality are formed, as activity, interest and openness to the new, healthy curiosity. Tibetans rightly believe that up to five years old, the child is deprived of logic in any manifestations, which means that can’t perceive causal relationships. Punishment for misconduct at this age will not be conscious – it will become coercion, conditioned reflex on the principle of the whip, and not a gingerbread. Nothing should interfere with the child to develop, especially obedience, submission and breaking of natural behavior.
Tibetan method of education of children – five-year plan number 2
At the achievement of the five-year-old age, "child-centers" in the perception of parents and households changes on their opposite. The time of simple, but tough behavioral directives that the child should, if possible, do unquestionably. During this period, the logical thinking of a small Tibetan is formed, and in the representations of the parents, this is a nonlinear process – everything happens to jumps, segments and stages. For disobedience, the punishment should be impossible, as a rule, expressed through disapproval, condemnation, reprimand. Physical strength applies only in the most force majeure situations of life danger. The main task of the current five-year period is to develop "feedback" and reflexing gains. Baby socializes, learns to adapt to the norms of behavior in the family and society, responds to approval and reigning of their actions. At this time, a special "Eastern" respect for older, confidence in the authority, justice and the strength of the traditional lifefriend of life is laid.
Tibetan method of education of children – five-year plan number 3
From the ten-year-old age, the little Tibetan finally grows up to a serious and equal attitude towards his words and actions. At the same time, a certain facet of respect for the opinions, statements and suggestions of the child, but without the slightest hint of inducing. Adults smarter, the baby should not forget about it, but he appears right to independent acts, even if they are mistaken. This is the time of long conversations and explanations, intensive studies and spiritual growth. And if the Tibetan tradition pronouncedly regulates social and intimidate behavior, then freedom of thought – practically no.
Besides development, this five-year plan and danger. If the baby, according to the educators, makes a lot of mistakes in actions, did not learn to properly distinguish good from evil and his behavior is recognizable asocial character – they can "wave as hand". Since in Tibetan families, as a rule, many children, then entering the conditional second grade does not promise a person nothing good – a significant share in the inheritance, no respect among the relatives. Understanding this price of your behavior, small Tibetans, in comparison with European peers, are much easier and unnoticed by objective difficulties of puberty (adolescent) period.
Tibetan method of education of children – five-year plan №4
Fifteen-year-old Tibetan is considered quite formed in the social sense. Natives can only help with advice, send and prompt – the time of harsh prohibitions passes and adult life comes. During these years, Tibetans (most often than the boys) continue their spiritual and vocational education outside the house, as a rule, in schools in temples or monasteries. If the teenager manifests itself from the best side, he is provided with the greatest freedom in actions, especially if compared with other countries of the Confucian-Buddhist region.
The main principle of the Tibeta method of upbringing a child is avoiding errors. Unnecessary and asocial features of the person in this society are visible as in the palm of palm, and they do not be divided under ease or fashionable subculture, as in Europe. Reduced intellectual and informative abilities, inability to targeted work (both independent and under the guidance), deafness to spiritual quest and religious feeling – all this is considered serious vices that do not give a chance to a high place in society. Maybe from our point of view, the Tibetan technique will seem somewhat primitive, but this simplicity has its advantages – in this society, psychic disorders in the soil of social experiences are extremely rare, the personality is obtained by one-piece, capable of further physical and spiritual development.